George S. Pransky's book, The Relationship Handbook: A simple guide to satisfying relationships (ISBN 0971198802), is a lesser-known, self-published book that contains a number of strong insights into building a strong marriage. This book is worth reviewing as a supplement to my book, Dragonslayer, while working to overcome the disease of Gender Role Reversal.
Chapter 3: Communication
If a relationship is off track, communication is, at best, like brushing your teeth right before you eat candy.
Pransky states that, "Communication is a pipe through which feelings pass." In other words, if you feel positive, your relationship will be uplifted and vice versa if you feel negative.
Pransky uses a similar analogy as Willard Harley's book His Needs, Her Needs. In Pransky's example the currency is feelings. Each time you communicate positive feelings you make a deposit, while negative communication requires a withdrawal. The stronger the feeling, the larger the deposit or withdrawal.
The Sigma Male Says
Positive vs. negative communication is a no-brainer. As we all learned from Thumper in the movie, Bambi, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."
Recognize, however, that if you're experiencing marriage problems, saying nice things to your wife like putting a band-aid on a gaping wound. Taking positive ACTION is relationship triage. In my book, calls this simple skillset Dragonslaying. The best way to communicate care and concern is to slay your wife's dragons—recognize and be willing to take care of her problems.
Dragonslaying is automatic money in the bank.
Next up: Moods