Monday, May 13, 2013

Sex If You're a Slob? Not Unless It's With "Lassie."


"What's that delicious smell?"

I'm somewhat embarrassed to admit to having seen the movie Porky's, a raunchy 1982 comedy about over-sexed teenage boys—even if I was one at the time. 

In one "memorable" scene, a young gym coach is told that he will discover the secret of the nubile gym coach's nickname "Lassie" if he can get her into the boys' locker room. As it turns out, Lassie, played by a very young and very brunette Kim Cattrall, is extremely turned on by the smell of gym sweat, so much so that it makes her howl!

After spending some time online, it is apparent that some men have taken this movie scene to heart. Before you roll your eyes, consider this plea found on an online marriage advice forum:

Hi all, I am new here and looking for some advice. My husband showers Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, never on weekends. He brushes his teeth 4-5 times a week, also never on weekends. We don't kiss anymore because I am disgusted with his oral hygiene. He shaves about once or twice a month. We haven't had sex in 6 months because his showering habits gross me out… I have discussed the issue with him… He said that he's always been like this, even before we were married. But honestly I don't remember it ever being so bad like this.

This poor wife’s dilemma is only one of countless others I have encountered online and in consultations — some worse but all of a similar nature. In spite of what Hollywood taught you as a teenager, women do not want to make love to a musty sweat sock. I've come across more than one survey that lists cleanliness as one of the top ten things a woman finds attractive in a man, reminding us that body odor is not a sexual pheromone.

Just as fitness and organization are indicators of your physical and mental status, cleanliness is an outward show of your emotional well-being; in fact, studies show that personal hygiene actively promotes positive mental health. If you respect yourself and your wife, you must take care of your hygiene. Show your wife you are in control emotionally by keeping yourself clean.

She will thank you for it in more ways than one.

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