Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Whose Fault Is It?

Unhappy couple
A friend forwarded me an email from an advice columnist, Beth Young, titled Whose Fault When Marriages Fail?

Ms. Young makes a great point:

It's easy to point the finger when it seems as if our marriage is struggling.  Point to stresses at work, our spouse, our children and a plethora of others excuses for why our marriage feels like it's failing.

However, one key factor we need to realize when we feel like our marriage is going down the tubes is that we are ultimately responsible for the health and happiness of our relationship.

If both spouses take responsibility for success, then it will be a success.  But even if only one spouse takes this ugly bull by the horns, the marriage can be saved.  Are you willing to be the one?

While it's true that it's easier to forge a strong marriage when both partners take responsibility for a marriage, Young's second point--that a marriage can be saved by only one spouse--is much more important!

Why? Because in my experience, 99% of unhappy relationships are caused by husbands who fail to fill the inherent responsibilities that come with being a man, and women are only reacting to the frustration of having to play dual roles in their marriage: wife and husband!

Whether we're talking about infidelity, hostility, or disinterest in sex, all of these maladies can be traced back to the same root cause. Men, if you're unhappy with the state of your marriage, it's time to take a long look in the mirror.

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